Fic: G.I.R.L.

[avirjin]

Title: G.I.R.L.
Fandom: Exo
Focus: Sehun-centric, Chanyeol/Sehun
Genre: Gen
Rating: PG-13 (because of one innuendo and a furry mention smh)
Length: Oneshot, 2164 words
Summary: Pretending to be a girl gamer in order to hustle high-grade equipment out of creeps sounds like it'd be one of Jongin's worse ideas, but surprisingly, it works out pretty well for Sehun. MMORPG!AU. 

In retrospect, Jongin's ideas are always actually terrible. It's amazing how Sehun never actually catches on during the planning process, but for all his awkwardness Jongin has a way with words, has some quality to him that twists the completely fucked up reasoning process in his head and translates it into what sounds like actual working logic at the time. Buying their mothers two-for-the-price-of-one balloon bouquets stamped with fancy, cursive I Love You almost three months early because of the after Valentine's Day sales. Setting up his hyung with one of Jongin's noonas on a blind date so they could be actually related without having to marry each other. Untying the leash of a dog they pass on the way home from school every day because it looks so bored and would be much happier with them and I would know, Sehun, I understand dogs, I own three of them after all! 

 

The balloons had deflated -- as balloons are prone to do over time -- and neither he nor Jongin had bothered checking the closet they'd stashed them in for months as they used what money they saved on fried chicken deliveries and internet cafes. By the time Parents' Day came and went, both he and Jongin had been lacking presents for their disappointed mothers and money in their wallets, aborting any attempts to fix the situation.

 

His hyung had ended up slapped in the face. Not by Jongin's noona, who was as pretty and charming and lovely back then as she is even to this day, but by his own girlfriend who refused to believe their little brothers had conned them into a date and ditched them.

 

The dog bit hard. The owner possibly harder. Sehun still had a faint scar on his shoulder, Jongin had a matching one on his ass. 

 

Years of misadventures later and one would think Oh Sehun had learned the one true lesson of life: never actually go through with Kim Jongin's dumbass plans.

 

And yet.

 

"You think this could actually work?" he asks as they sit shoulder to shoulder in Jongin's room, their laptops on a makeshift table of cardboard boxes in front of them. Jongin's desk had been too clustered with greasy take-out boxes and piles of half-read manga and the occasional stray homework assignment to have enough room for both of them. 

 

Sehun's screen is on the final stages of a character customization page, while Jongin's is on a fanmade wikia. Jongin had talked him through the process of signing up for the free-to-play MMORPG that had been sweeping the nation -- "Only the nerdy part of the nation," Sehun had laughed, which, Jongin had reasoned, was basically still the whole nation anyway -- and had then spent the better part of an hour pointing out the best combo of characteristics and traits to get the optimal stats. 

 

"How am I supposed to be able to level up if my defense and HP are the equivalent of wet paper," he asks as Jongin tweaks the skin color of his character again. Any paler and he might as well be playing a ghost, honestly. "I won't even be able to party up with anyone if my character dies after one hit." 

 

"We need you to be as weak as possible," Jongin insists as he drags the cursor back and forth between the buttons that could change the race of Sehun's character from a classical elf to an alluring foxtail, "also as hot as possible, hey, which do you think is better?"

 

Sehun mulls over it for a moment. Either way he ends up playing someone with weird-ass ears, might as well go the whole way with the tail. It's a cute fluffy tail anyway, and they can make it match with his real-life hair color whenever he dyes it, he guesses.

 

"I think guys who are into furries would be more desperate."

 

Jongin nods sagely and clicks on the foxtail option, both of them watching in fascination as Sehun's character loses a perfectly good pair of pointy ears in exchange for furry ones and that tail and the unfortunate side effect of forgetting a character skill every time he levels up ten levels. It's perfect for the plan.

 

"I think we're all set," Jongin announces, sounding proud of himself as he always does after a scheme starts off as well as this one, "just a few more days and I can release you to the world wide web." 

 

Sehun leans back against Jongin's unmade bed, tilting his head as he takes in his character. Long and thin, just like he is in real life. Slightly bored ceiling eyes, courtesy of Jongin. Hair, ears, and tail currently a simple brown color just like his own hair color, although Jongin had promised that it could be adjusted in-game without a supposedly expensive and rare appearance reset potion as a special quality of the character's race. They also set it to be in the Summoner class just like Jongin's character, but instead of the Animal Trainer subclass, Jongin had chosen a special subclass just for their plan.

 

Courtesan. 

 

"I think the boobs are too big," Sehun mutters. At least the big ass kinda matches his own, so no complaints there. "Can we make them smaller? Just a bit?"

 

Jongin sighs wearily as he readjusts the settings, like he's doing Sehun a huge favor rather than the other way around. Like Sehun's not the one being talked into pretending to be a hot girl gamer and being thrown to the wolves, all in the name of hustling cash shop loot and baiting white knights.

 

 

 

 

Crossplaying requires a certain sensitivity that Sehun is proud to have. 

 

"You're just playing a girl, you don't actually have to cry all the time," Jongin says completely missing the point as usual, and whining only a little when his visiting noona slaps him upside the head for the casual sexism. He charges on with that familiar bull-headedness anyway, "I mean, just stick to crying emoticons. And hearts. Girls use those, right?" 

 

Sehun doesn't have the heart to tell him that emoticons and hearts are plastered all over his own Instagram too. It's not worth the teasing and Jongin laughing so hard that Sehun's back is the one hurting from all the slaps.

 

For the most part though, Sehun ignores Jongin's 'tips' and just plays the way he normally would. Summons whatever monsters or elements he has in his arsenal, grinds like crazy and beats as many mobs as he can into the ground, and collects all the loot he can get his hands on. He's still buying cool gear and outfits from the NPC shop owners when he's not getting Jongin's level appropriate hand-me-downs or being gifted with expensive cash shop goods from strangers.

 

There's only one real difference really: he plays completely on mute.

 

The muting isn't so bad. He can play his own music in the background instead of the game's BGM, and he doesn't have to deal with creeps cursing him and his parents out just because he doesn't -- can't -- send them nonexistent boob pics. There's no need to wear heavy headphones on his head or worry about the sound quality, and when his phone rings or someone knocks on his door, he can actually hear them unlike Jongin. 

 

It does make party raids harder, but Jongin is always there teaming up with him and telling him what the group is planning before anyone has time to type it out in the chatbox so generally things go pretty smoothly. 

 

[you're pretty good, sehee sshi :D], the tall elf bard they teamed up with that evening writes in the party chat, [and your cat summon was cute].

 

Sehun snorts, once again thankful there's no mic around to catch the sound and transmit it. A month into playing and this is the third guy this week. Jongin had been so happy with his new, limited edition summoner's staff after Sehun had charmed some Gangnamite gold mine the other day, but he's been eyeing some special, ridiculously expensive summoner-class only armor to match his shiny new toy.

 

[thnx oppa!!] he sends back shamelessly. His character's tail sways and her ears twitch cutely right on cue.

 

As expected, shortly after, a window pops up in the middle of his screen, stating that HappyVirus61 wants to start a private conversation. Sehun doesn't even bother nudging Jongin in the rib anymore -- if he did it every single time a interested player approached him, Jongin would be too bruised for dance lessons. Instead, he accepts the request and leans back against the head of his bed as the chat window pops up. 

 

[i'm kinda jealous, the cat really was cute u_u i'm allergic irl so i don't get to play w/ them :( ]

 

Sehun blinks. Not quite what he was expecting, but it's not an unsalvageable situation. If it was Jongin, he'd probably tell Sehun to start flirting hardcore. I've got another pussy you'd have no problem playing with or something neither of them would actually say in real life without wanted to curl up on the ground and die. 

 

[that's pretty sad :( ], Sehun writes instead because he has some dignity left and because it's true. He imagines how Jongin would be if he ended up allergic to any of his dogs and it's pitiful. [at least you can play with fictional cats here? when we're not killing them]. 

 

[LOLOLOLOL you're pretty funny, sehee sshi]. He wonders if HappyVirus61 is actually laughing, whether he looks as cute as his character when he laughs or if he's just some basement nerd loser with a beer belly chortling away, but posts a harmless lol as well anyway. 

 

The conversation actually stays pretty mild as they re-enter the dungeon. Neither of them are front-liners anyway -- that responsibility falls on HappyVirus61's three, tinier friends and Jongin -- so they're free to sit back and cast buff songs or summon small helpful creatures as they see fit and chat lightly. Once in a while, one of HappyVirus61's friends will tell them to actually pay attention to the battles, but no one's even come close to dying yet. No harm, no foul, no need for Sehun to take his attention off their private chat as HappyVirus61 talks about the rap music he likes and the instruments he plays when he's not playing the game. 

 

Sehun ignores how Jongin is glancing over at him from the other side of the room approvingly in favor of sending HappyVirus61 another smiling emoticon.

 

[can i call you something other than oppa?] he finally asks before they reach the dungeon boss again. The others are all taking potions and restoring their HP and MP, talking over strategy and things Sehun doesn't actually care about. Jongin can just shout orders at him in real life if it's urgent enough. 

 

[what if i like you calling me oppa?] 

 

It reads like flirting. Sehun is almost disappointed, because if this guy takes the bait now, he's probably gonna end up blocked tomorrow morning if Jongin hasn't found another way to lose him. He's already starting to mentally go through Jongin's wish list to figure out what HappyVirus61 would be most likely to get him when the chatbox lights up again.

 

[just kidding! or am i...? lol call me chanyeol \o/ now are you ready to finish this :DDDD? ]

 

Sehun's hands hesitate over the keyboard. "Chanyeol," he whispers, voice hoarse from hours of little use and less water, his tongue stumbling between the syllables. It's stupid, but he doesn't really want the raid to end, their conversation either.

 

[can i add you first?] he asks, thankful Jongin can't see his screen from here.

 

Chanyeol is silent, his player character motionless for several minutes. It gets to the point where his friends keep spamming AFK???? PCY R U AFK? gdi in the party's public chat. 

 

[HAPPYVIRUS61 HAS ADDED YOU TO HIS FRIENDS LIST], the system alerts Sehun, right as Chanyeol's character starts up again and runs to catch up to the rest of their party. This time it's Sehee who stays in place, her fox ears twitching as if she's as lost in thought as Sehun is. 

 

Sehun opens his menu window, selecting the Friends List tab so he can return the favor. 

 

It's the second name he adds ever.

 

 

 

 

"So any luck?" Jongin asks after they've put away their laptops for the night and are watching some drama his sister had recommended. Like the rare loot they'd gotten from the dungeon raid hadn't been enough to sate him. 

 

Sehun grunts instead of bothering to answer, stuffing his mouth full of pizza more as an excuse than because he's actually hungry. He can give Jongin all the gifts desperate lonely gamer guys keep sending him in exchange for flirty winks and rendered pantyshots, no problem. 

 

But this time he has something he wants to keep for himself.

Original Post: Here.
Author's Note: Written for Round 3 of WCAU. It's actually an idea I've had for a while, mainly because I used to read 1/2 Prince a long while back and because at the time of WCAU, I was really into Log Horizon. Both series are about MMORPG games, although the first is a virtual reality one where the main character plays as the other gender while the second is a "trapped in another world" type of story where the original gaming platform was just PC. The gaming mechanics (sub/classes, races, cash shop, etc) were based off of the Log Horizon mode, and the idea of Sehun just muting people so he wouldn't out himself just off of his voice is taken from how Akatsuki canonically hid her gender before the series startedl. The design for Sehun's character comes from Log Horizon's Nureha, and the name he chooses from a radio show where he acted out a skit with Chnayeol and Kyungsoo in the role of the girl. HappyVirus61 is pretty obviously Chanyeol, his name coming from his nickname + his jersey number, while the Gangnam boy Sehun and Kai conned previously was Suho lol. And finally, Kai coming up with Bad Ideas is based off of how on Showtime episode 3, it seemed Kai was the one to make all of the arguments for why they should get Chanyeol convenience store bullshit as his birthday present, while Sehun just accepted his completely ridiculous justifications and went along for the ride lol. Hm, I think that's it? I'd like to write a continuation one day, and maybe include Suho/Kai in it but we'll see if I ever get to that, I guess.

By the way, G.I.R.L. stands for "Guy in real life". Ha.